Losing It

Okay, first let me describe our final “no more grocery shopping” breakfast. As my kids would say, “It was dee-scusting.” So, I ran out of eggs from the egg lady. Since that is a very planned purchase, I couldn’t just go pick some up last night when I discovered my lack. I’ve also been out of milk for about 10 days, and while no one minds me cooking with the morning moo, the kids will neither drink it straight, nor pour it over cereal. Additionally, our Halloween adventures depleted the last of my hot chocolate stores. We went through the better part of a #10 can that night and as we served up over 150 cups of hot cocoa. I did have a free loaf of bread acquired from the bread store. I decided this bread and some “from scratch” hot chocolate along with some cut fruit would be breakfast.

I put the bread on my baking stone and put it in the oven to toast. Then I poured several cups of morning moo into a pan and started it simmering. I’d give you my food storage hot cocoa recipe, but it was awful, so it might be best if we wait till I perfect it. I added cocoa powder and sugar, then some vanilla and cinnamon. I don’t know if it was the vanilla or the cocoa powder, but that was the worst hot chocolate ever. Bitter and bad, everyone left all but a first sip in their mugs. The toast was eyed suspiciously by all (except Don, of course) “Why do they always have to put all those grainy, seedy things into it?“ one child questions. “Your bread is never like this. You don’t leave chunks of stuff in it, Mom,” another remarks while scrutinizing her meager meal. When it came time to serve the fruit I realized all my pears were ready for a pear crisp, the apples were wrinkly (probably from hanging out with the flaccid pears too long) and the plums were looking more like mushy prunes that they should, so I scratched the fruit plan.

It wasn’t a stellar morning for quality family time either, usually we get at least 15 minutes to sit together, eat and read. Today, I think we had five minutes. The kids have worked past complaining about our meals of late, but I knew this one left a lot to be desired by the looks on their faces. Breakfast was cut short because we were searching for shoes, one of my least favorite mom activities. I read one verse of scripture and our favorite car pool arrived, horn honking. Caleb was still looking for his shoes. My first, second and third response was frustration as the car pool patiently waited. Then, I remembered, we all lose things. On Halloween, I lost my brand new digital camera. I’m still praying and searching to find it. In my searching I’ve found lots of other things that I, the mom, have lost over the last little while, some of them important things. Some of the things I’ve lost, and found include:

1. My extra set of car keys which miraculously showed up on an end table
2. A coupon for a sale (found the day after the sale)
3. An antique song book, lent to me by a friend (boy was I glad to find that)
4. My very special scouting sweater that holds all of my scouting mom pins (I didn’t even know it was missing, but I found it in the lost and found at school)
5. My favorite purfume that I searched and searched for and finally found today in a place I've looked many times before

Realizing my hypocrisy I immediately apologized to Caleb. I sent him to school in sandals and told him I’d bring his shoes when I brought Hannah for kindergarten. As they all pulled away, I went back into the house and into the kitchen, there, on the floor in a corner were his shoes. Sometimes things don’t show up until you’ve learned what you needed while that thing is gone from your life. I think that applies to the lessons of my “no more grocery shopping” experiment. Just as I’m learning to get along without my weekly trips to the store, the experiment is over and I can get on with life as usual. But, once you’ve found your truth, do you ever really go back? I don’t know, it will be interesting to see. Stay tuned to my top ten lessons learned.